WomenCo.

We want the truth, the hole-in-your-pants truth about embarrassing things that have happened to you at work.

When I worked as a dental assistant, I occasionally had a problem with gas....ah hum....and you are right there looking down the patient's nose as they are looking up yours. Not to mention the close proximity of the dr. and the small rooms you work in. So, I figured it was O.K. as long as the doc and I had on our masks. Then I just used my suction to try to "catch" the rest. YOU did say "hole-in-your-pants- truth! This is it!

For me the most embarrassing situation was when I was in the women's bathroom washing my hands, and the big boss of the office comes in to use the toilet. She had the most explosive diarrhea I have ever heard, and I just didn't know how to look her in the face without hearing those miserable sounds ever again. I mean, I know that there's nothing she or I could have done to make that situation any better, but it was just so awkward for me!

Well, my former workplace's weekly happy hour always had its "moments."

Here's a sampling:

• A manager at the company came out of the bathroom of the bar with lipstick on his face.


• A co-worker told the entire office, after a few beers, about how her husband was leaving her. With every depressing detail you could imagine. It was just so awkward and strange.


• And I definitely, definitely.... mistook my boss' wife for pregnant. (!!!!!!!) I will NEVER NEVER live it down. Thankfully she had a good sense of humor, and is good-natured, because otherwise I might have been fired.

Often, I worked through my lunch break and closed my door so I could correct papers. I was locked inside of my classroom, not once but twice in one week. Of course, the office intercom was often unmanned during lunch, and cell service did not work in the building.  I reported the lock as broken and was told not to lock the door and I complied. The first time the janitor checked the lock only from the outside. Whatever he did made the door stick from the inside of the room when it was unlocked. To make matters worse, I was on the third floor with no egress. It was blatantly unsafe if there was a fire or an emergency evacuation. 

The administration did not fix the problem until all of my students were locked out of my room while I was inside the room. The vice principal came by and heard the commotion from my students in the hall.  The window in the door was a small slit and too narrow view a note. The VP strides in, armed for bear, and he starts to ask me, "Why?" As he was talking, I turned to close the door and asked him to open it. He turned bright red and apologized when the door would not open. He used his walkie-talkie to call for help. For the next few weeks, the door was without a lock until a replacement arrived, but at least I was not captive. 

I had to call dozens of patients one day, and left meassages with about twenty people. Apparently , I had been leaving my HOME phone number all day long. Interesting, and humbling, checking my message machine when I got home !!!  No idea where my brain was that day- oops!

I was working in a new job as a nurse manager at a large nursing facility. I filled in at the quarterly quality assurance meeting for another manager who was unable to be there. She asked me to present her report summarizing infection control information from the previous 3 months. Among other things, the report listed types of organisms identified in blood, urine and wound cultures. Imagine my horror when, in front of the building administrator, director of nursing, physical therepist, speech therapist, pharmacist and 2 doctors (most of whom I barely knew) I say, "The orgasms identified were. . ."   By the next day, they were making jokes at the local hospital about the nursing home keeping track of orgasms.

I was running really really late and a cop that is a family friend saw me running down the street to my work and offered to give me a ride to work.  By law you are not allowed to ride in the front seat so he put me in the back and drove me to work.  I arrived there he let me out of the car and I ran into the already teaming Starbucks (yes I worked THERE!) and screamed "sorry I am late I got detained!"  I already called my manager and told her I could not find my keys and was running late (BOY did I get the GREATEST looks from those customers)  This was an upper scale place so heh oops, I probably SOOOO got mis-understood!  (Yes I did give my cop friend a free coffee and he made fun of me for MONTHS over it!)