WomenCo.

You are not the first nor the last to have let your emotions show a little too strongly. I am sure you are one of the only people who is still thinking about the situation. I guess my first question would be -- how did you deal with the situation at the time? Did you excuse yourself, explain that things outside of the professional arena were the reason why you were so upset?

I think the 2nd poster said it best: You're probably the only one still thinking about this.

I take it, too, that you've never cried in public/at work before. So this is probably why it's so shocking. Relax.

I think we all hit our own stumbling blocks, yet we rise, dust ourselves off and search for ideas, actions to empower our walk with grace in the work environment that brings respect.

Try wearing a different pair of sunglasses and take a second look at the situation, i.e. a hidden friend’s point of view. With an open mind learn to see what appears to have taken place; a ‘normal’ or perhaps ‘typical’ reaction to a stressor that traditionally would not have evoked an emotional response from you.

Skip the judgment phase and find the stairway leading back to where you stepped off. At this point it is important to take a step back, find solid footing and work on what needs to be accomplished right here-right now at work.

When you or your boss gauge performance capacity realize your work activity, day in and day out, sets the parameters that define success. So re-vamp, re-work and streamline the qualities that bring you success, i.e. stay focused, complete tasks without assigning emotional value and all work decisions are based on fact and nothing else.

When you experience an emotional trigger in your work day, take a time out, walk away and ask yourself “What do I need to accomplish today and what do I need to do to get there?” Return, implement your decision, focus and you will find a more relaxed work posture; this ‘new demeanor’ allows the free exchange of respect with co-workers.

I’ve seen excellent results when an emotional display is given a 24 hour quiet period before it is addressed with management. Meaning complete your step back, become your own quiet advocate and keep your response to a minimum, nothing more then 2-3 minutes. Your response should address only the positive acts/action that will be taken and not an emotion or explaination of the emotions involved in the break.

You will do just fine.

Anonymous says ...

Fortunately this is the one thing women can still get away with in the office that men can't...

I don't know that I'm proud of this statement. I would hope we'd be just as accepting of a man showing emotion, even if it's in a slightly awkward situation like the one described above by the original poster.

It doesn't make you any less professional...it makes you human. One of the problematic realities with dependable, high achieving professionals is that others may look upon us as "perfect and having no flaws" and the result for the professional who "buys in" to this is the potential to deny your own humanity. Having a "game-face" on 24/7 is doesn't make you more professional it dehumanizes you.  

I hope that encourages you to do as someone already suggest, "carry on." After all, you didn't get to where you are with just your gifts and talents alone--someone connected with your humanity too!

 Like an earlier poster said, it shows your human.  Everyone in that room was either a woman themselves or knows at least one woman and know that we can at times be emotional creatures. 

I work in a high stress and very fast-paced environment - not to mention the fact that many here are unproffessional to say the least. I'd been here over 6mos when I broke down. And I SSSOOO didn't want to bc so many ppl think we use that to our advantage, but I'm not like that - sometimes I just can't help it and in all the years I've worked I've only cried once before this (and that was when I was in High School). I have the rudest couple of supervisors to deal with who'd stop at nothing (verbally anyway) to prove their points, but I also had some MAJOR marital problems that were pretty much an ongoing thing in my life at the time. I had a hard time dealing w/ the yelling, cussing, back stabbing, gossip, the pushing others down when they were trying to take initiative and so on. Eventually I broke down one day - and for everyone else it was obvious why (because of the work environment) but no one knew what I was dealing w/ at home. I finally told the GM and my Mgr that my marriage was on borderline divorce terms because of my husbands Alcoholism (we are seperated now). This (and the fact that I talked to the GM about the unprofessionalism coming from my supervisors) shed some light on my emotional state - my mgr and the owner (main instigators here) weren't so quik to lay into me - or others - so hard. People have alot more understanding and consideration when they know you've got personal issues. Besides, what man hasn't angrily blown up at someone bc he's had a bad day?? Our emotions get the better of ALL of us from time to time, male or female!

This actually happened to me yesterday, during a meeting with my bosses.  We were discussing issues between us and my emotions just went haywire.  Now...it is an emotional time for me personally, my brother passed away 3 years ago and his birthday is next week, add to that, my man's father was just diagnosed with cancer last week.  So, needless to say, I'm strung a little tight.  It got the better of me yesterday.  That has never happened before, in fact I am usually quite solid at work.

I apologized and quickly explained that the emotions were not work related and to excuse my tears please.  We continued the meeting with kleenex and agreed to move forward from there.

All I can do at this point is continue on with regained composure and work hard.  I don't think you lose credibility if you don't dwell on it and try not to let it happen again.