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Never Satisfied? Try These Six Negativity Busters

Never Satisfied? Try These Six Negativity Busters

Turn that frown upside down: Think positive.

Alexandra Levit | DivineCaroline

May 20, 2008

I am one of those people who has the tendency to never be satisfied. It is like a disease.

When I was in college, I wanted a communications job in New York City. Once I had that job, I wanted to get ahead quickly. A couple of promotions later, I decided I didn’t like working in Corporate America and started my own marketing business. I got that business going fairly easily, but found I was spending too much time attracting and servicing clients and wanted more time to write. Now I write full time, and I miss the daily people interaction!

I inherited this trait from my dad and it’s reinforced by my equally unsatisfied husband. But no matter. The way I’m headed, this will go on and on until I’m dead. And in heaven, no one gives you a gold star because you were successful in a variety of endeavors.

I think that in the end, what really matters is if you were happy or not. And if you’re never satisfied with your lot, it sure is hard to be happy. I’ve asked some people for advice on how to become more satisfied, and here are some of the gems I’ve heard and tried myself:

Don’t always “one-up”: It’s annoying when an acquaintance does it to you in a bar, so don’t do it to yourself. When you meet a goal you worked hard for, take a moment to celebrate the achievement instead of immediately focusing on what you can, or should do next.

Live in the moment: As Ferris Bueller famously said, “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.” People who get bogged down in the past or are always looking ahead to the future miss the small joys of life—like eating a perfectly well-done burger or seeing their baby smile—that are right in front of them today.

Find a positive angle: Everyone experiences setbacks, but be careful not to allow a negative turn of events to color your view of the world. Look for something in the scenario that will help you learn and grow, and focus on that as you weather through.

Look for the good in people: It’s easy to ruminate on your friends’ and family members’ flaws, as I’m sure there are many of them. But by having unrealistic expectations of what people should do or how they should act, you’re setting yourself for disappointment. The truth is that most people mean well, even if they screw up every now and then.

Be thankful for the big things: In my house, we have a tendency to “sweat the small stuff.” But come on. I have a great career, a stable family, a roof over my head, and a healthy body. Do I really need to fret over the fact that Bass didn’t take my expired coupons?

Beware of the “grass is always greener”: You don’t know the intimate details of other people’s situations, so it’s irrational to be jealous of them. And remember that you can be satisfied without being perfect. Even if you have your dream job or your dream family, you’re bound to have bad days. That doesn’t mean you should overhaul everything because you think you can do better someplace else.


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  • Photo_user_blank_big

    VirtuousWoman12

    3 months ago

    4 comments

    Thanks for sharing this very special article.
  • Photo_user_blank_big

    tomich8714

    3 months ago

    2 comments

    I'm right there with ya. I just completed my Master's degree, and already I'm looking to whatever that next thing is. At 49, working full-time and the mother of 3, it was quite an accomplishment. I miss the learning atmosphere, the structure of studying, the people I found things in common with, etc.. I feel just a little empty right now. Have gone back to the gym, though, and am finding my sense of humor again which is nice. Still, I would like to be o.k. with just "being". Looking for the next journey I guess.
  • 4x5hermandez_016_max50

    ChrisMar

    3 months ago

    74 comments

    Living in the moment...aah, that's something I remind myself of constantly!
  • Little-girl-at-estancion-mucunu-nr--merida-photo--_smgpx10001x15374x16b0e06d6_max50

    LilaK

    3 months ago

    106 comments

    I kind of want to print out this article and post on my refrigerator door. I engage in negative thinking a little too much. I forget to live in the moment, and am too cynical sometimes. While I overall feel that I have a positive attitude, it can definitely be tinged by little negative thoughts on a constant basis. Great article.
  • Ann_max50

    AnnEvanston

    3 months ago

    140 comments

    I believe in positive mental attitude - it is one thing I 100% control!
  • Danielasmall_max50

    Daniela

    3 months ago

    1434 comments

    This is perfect advice for someone like me who thinks too much about what's next, what's next, and often forgets to revel in the present

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