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Stay Cool At Work
Anuradha Mayer | WomenCo.
July 08, 2008
We’ve all seen people lose their cool at work. Let’s face it, we have all experienced getting angry at points in our career. The workplace is more complex and demanding than ever. Many of us depend on other people to do our jobs. Situations arise that we often cannot control. Plus we may have additional demands in our home life. Even the coolest heads have a boiling point and may feel their heart beat faster and cheeks become flush.
Anger is a normal human emotion, the key is ‘what’ we do and ‘how’ we handle ourselves when something gets under our skin at work. Bottom line is that displaying anger at work does not reflect well on our ability to keep our cool in difficult circumstances.
To prepare for the next time your blood pressure goes up, consider the following points:
• Recognize when the fire starts to burn. Think about the last time you were angry or annoyed. Often our body will have a reaction before we can we have understood it intellectually. One of my clients talked about how his voice changed when he felt anger rising within him. Understanding when anger is coming on will help us effectively deal with our emotion before we say or do something we might regret
• Take a break. We are often not proud of how we reacted in the heat of anger. Once you recognize that you are angry, find a way to take time away to come up with a plan for how you will respond. Something like a 15min walk could be the difference between being skillfully assertive or displaying defensive angry behavior.
• What are you really upset about? Was it because the project was delayed or was the immediate situation something that just set off a reaction to other issues that have been festering. Before reacting, step back and contemplate what is behind your reaction.
• Are you taking yourself too seriously? In the big scheme of things, how important is the issue? Could you be overreacting. Is it perhaps time to recharge your batteries and take a vacation? A little time off can help us put challenges both personal and professional challenges in perspective.
• Get a second opinion. Seek advice some a trusted friend or colleague. Share the situation as objectively as possible and ask for their candid thoughts. Talk through your plan for how to want to address the issues.
Staying cool as cucumber when our feathers have been ruffled is no easy task, yet we can learn to manage our anger along with other emotions.
To learn more, check out Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ by Daniel Goleman.

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